This must be the last piece I have in my pocession of past works, it was made during one of my first stay in psychiatric hospital, while I made tons of primal tiny masks and heads in clay, now this combined with the art I see on tublr, the need of creating becoming stronger and stronger anew made me decide to start making rag-dolls, so I focus now on trying to draw what will be the first one by doing squetches and researches, It is hard to fight against my brain, but I must succeed. I am now done looking into the attic and ready to start a new journey
A lil picture I made this summer that makes sense to me only now.
After making some mistakes again, that I am sure of now, put the persons I was trying to become friend with into ignore mode, I have hibernated some days waiting for an improbable answer and now at 6h05.AM I feel finally like a new day as come.
Being a no-man’s land where everything must be reconstructed is hard, but way better than being dead inside like I once was, I often act like a kid in this world of adults, and make the silliest moves, but I hope I will be able to grow-up without sacrifying this part of child in me.
Now ready again to jump into the action and continue the reconstruction
Thanks to you stacyrules and your blog, browsing through your awesome blog helped me tremendously arriving at this conclusion and not dwell on this recent mistake,
I have finally been able to find anew my only remaining stuff.Be carefull using drugs and hear the shamans warnings, you could destroy so much in your life, using only natural drugs like weed and various mushrooms brought me to psychiatric hospital several times in the past and during one crisis I destroyed every painting I had. Better using none than using them like a mad scientist or blindly. I know now that I will be able to achive what was my goal without any drugs and being clean, so if you are in the process of being tempted to use any drug for the first time, think of all you could loose.
These are all that remain from my early beginings. I remember the extasy of creation and the fight it was to remain in this strange and mysterious state of mind and soul. I haven’t done anything in years, but tryed many times each time it is a real pain, like if my brain had assimiled that painting is bad for my mental health, I don’t know how will the next try of painting will go, but until now I am kind of mentally allergic to the process of painting or drawing again, even if I really need and want to paint again. One thing is sure: it will be a clean fight.
Anna Rynefors and Erik Ask-Upmark | Amollarn | Dråm
Amongster by POLICA